Why Beyonce is basically Jesus

A couple of days ago, Beyoncé decided to release an album, just out of the blue (Ivy). It's a pretty fantastic album. She shook and woke up the world with an album, which is the best way to be awoken. The album consists of 14 songs and 17 videos, which is how a pop album should be done. It's called 'BEYONCÉ' which is quite shit, isn't it? But it'll do because its BEYONCÉ!

I've already talked about my favourite songs of 2013, but you can always rely on Beyoncé to come and snatch the weaves' of basic pop bitches. The album features help from Pharell, Drake and Jay-Z, but for me, it's all about Bey. Her vocals have never sounded purer or more amazing, the videos are stunning and I've been internally squealing for the past 2 days

Here are some bullet-pointed lists about the new album:

The good things about 'BEYONCÉ'

• It's Beyoncé.
• The element of surprise.
• The songs are pretty good.
• 'Drunk in Love' is a fucking tune.
• It's Beyoncé.
• She has collaborated with my Odd Future Prince Frank Ocean.
• She knows how to do trap music correctly.
• #FEMINISM
• The videos are pretty good.
• It's Beyoncé

The bad things about 'BEYONCÉ'

• The album artwork is pretty shit.
• The title
• It could do with some bangers.
• There are no 'Put a Donk on it' moments.
• She's featured her baby on a song.
• "Standing On The Sun" is not on the album.

 My favourite songs on 'BEYONCÉ'

• Pretty Hurts
• Drunk in Love
• Blow
• Partition
• Jealous
• Flawless

My least favourite (but still okay) songs on 'BEYONCÉ'

• No Angel
• Heaven
• Rocket
• Blue

What you will need to listen to 'BEYONCÉ'

• The actual album, which you exchange your money for here.
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